Why you should define your fears instead of your goals

The hard choices — what we most fear doing, asking, saying — are very often exactly what we need to do. How can we overcome self-paralysis and take action? Tim Ferriss encourages us to fully envision and write down our fears in detail, in a simple but powerful exercise he calls “fear-setting.” Learn more about how this practice can help you thrive in high-stress environments and separate what you can control from what you cannot.

Click here to watch this TED Talk  [13.21mins]

How a great conversation is like a game of catch

As a radio host, Celeste Headlee has engaged in her fair share of discussions and thought a lot about how to bring out the best in a conversational counterpart. One thing she likes to say: A good conversation is like a game of catch. She explains.

Click here to watch this interview on Facebook [20.28 mins]

Click here to download an edited account as a pdf document

10 ways to have a better conversation with Celeste Headlee

When your job hinges on how well you talk to people, you learn a lot about how to have conversations — and that most of us don’t converse very well. Celeste Headlee has worked as a radio host for decades, and she knows the ingredients of a great conversation: Honesty, brevity, clarity and a healthy amount of listening. In this insightful talk, she shares 10 useful rules for having better conversations. “Go out, talk to people, listen to people,” she says. “And, most importantly, be prepared to be amazed.”

To download and watch this clip – click here [11.44 mins]

How great leaders inspire action

Simon Sinek has a simple but powerful model for inspirational leadership — starting with a golden circle and the question “Why?” His examples include Apple, Martin Luther King, and the Wright brothers. In this TED Talk Simon Sinek explores how leaders can inspire cooperation, trust and change.

Click here to watch the clip  (17.57 mins)

How Great Leaders Drive Results Through Employee Engagement


engagement“There are only three measurements that tell you nearly everything you need to know about your organization’s overall performance:  employee engagement, customer satisfaction, and cash flow. 

It goes without saying that no company, small or large, can win over the long run without energized employees who believe in the mission and understand how to achieve it.”

Jack Welch, former CEO of General Electric

When a respected CEO like Jack Welch puts employee engagement in the top three factors for business success, you know it is a topic whose time has come.  That employee engagement is a viable business issue getting attention in the C-suite was more broadly confirmed recently in a Harvard study of companies with aggressive growth strategies.  Leaders were asked to identify the factors most important to the success of their growth strategy, and again, employee engagement made it to the top three with 71 per cent citing employee engagement as critical.1

Looking at profitability, a recent Aon Hewitt study  quantified the incremental impact of increases in engagement to the bottom line, and the results were impressive.

Originally published by The Forum Corporation in America, this fascinating article is well worth reading by Directors,  Line Managers, HR and Consultants.

Click here  to download the full article.






Managing Conflict and Disagreements

Managing Conflict pic

Conflict is part of any dynamic business organisation. It arises because people care and want to do their jobs well. Conflict is beneficial when the focus is on finding the best solution. It becomes destructive when the focus is on people and “winning at all costs.”


Conflict arises because of limited resources; differing goals, responsibilities and priorities; and differing ideas or interpretations. Conflict is especially difficult when it does not produce  solutions and becomes personal.

The goal of a manager or Coach should be to avoid “win-lose” situations and to ensure productive resolution of conflict. Effectively working through conflict results in stronger working relationships and encourages creative solutions – while handling conflict inappropriately results in damaged relationships and inhibits the expression of valuable opinions.

Valuable tips

  • Put yourself in the other person’s situation and imagine how you would feel and react. Look at the other side before defending your own.
  • At the beginning of a conflict discussion, express your desire for a resolution that is acceptable to both or all of you.
  • Restate the positions held by those on both sides of a conflict: look at it as a conflict of ideas or approaches, rather than of people.
  • Do not lecture about why you are right. Simply state your point of view.
  • Bring conflict into the open without feeling that your leadership is threatened. When people disagree with you, analyse the reason for their position.
  • Ask a neutral third party to help you and the conflicting party to talk through the problem. Your HR team will always help to mediate such a situation.
  • When a conflict situation arises, discuss it with your manager. When you have handled it, seek feedback from him or her about how successful you have been.
  • Allow individuals to vent their anger. Venting frustration allows them to get it out in the open and allows you to work through the conflict.
  • Clearly tell the other person the things you both agree on before dealing with their points of disagreement. This approach provides a positive starting point and builds bridges between you.
  • If the other person feels they are losing something or that you are being unfair, listen to what the person is saying; don’t try to convince the person that he or she is wrong.
  • Attack problems – not people.
  • If a conflict escalates, call for a time out. Reconvene when you have both reduced your tension to a productive level and you have both regained your perspective.
  • Instead of showing frustration, talk about it.
  • Be willing to confront other individuals when you feel they have made an error.

DP use the Thomas-Kilmann Conflict Mode Instrument. This is designed to assess an individual’s behaviour in conflict situations – situations in which the concerns of two people appear to be incompatible.

You can review this model and download a PDF version to complete the questionnaire to establish your current style of managing conflict and disagreements and anise these results to assess how changes might be beneficial to you, your colleagues and your team.

Click here to download a PDF version of further notes concerning the management of conflict and disagreements – and a copy of the Thomas-Killman instrument for you to complete and analyse your own style.





Effective Feedback


If you want to give feedback that is positive, keeps others on track for successful performance and leaves them feeling motivated to tackle future challenges you can use the following two types of feedback:


  1. Motivational Feedback – This usually starts with WHAT WAS GOOD….
    This helps someone to understand that what he or she is doing that is working well. It reinforces positive behaviours and actions – the more specific the feedback the more likely it is that they will understand and be able to replicate ‘the good stuff’.
  2. Developmental Feedback – This usually starts with WHAT WOULD MAKE IT (EVEN) BETTER….
    This helps someone to understand how to change what is not working well. It contains information on what they did or said (or didn’t do or didn’t say) and what the impact was.  It then offers ideas on how to do that differently in the future. The more specific the feedback, the more likely that the employee will understand and use more productive behaviours.

To read more about effective feedback, with examples and tips – click here to download a PDF version



Neurodiversity in the workplace

by Chris Evans July 2015 Published in ILM “The Edge”

From epilepsy and Tourette syndrome to Autism and Asperger’s, there are a variety of neurological conditions that need to be addressed and handled properly in the workplace. Chris Evans talks to several psychologists, diversity experts and business leaders who are tackling the conditions head on.


Most businesses are aware of the importance of a diverse workforce, bringing together people of different races, genders, ethnicities and religions. But what about the different ways each of us learn and process information, or communicate? These are vital factors when dealing with people who have neurological differences, including dyslexia, attention deficit hyperactivity disorder and autism.


Autism in the workplace

So often there have been stigmas, barriers and stereotypes attached to those with these conditions, particularly autistic people, which has restricted their ability to find work – only 15% of people with autism are in full-time employment – or flourish in a role. The common assumptions are that they will struggle to integrate into a ‘neuro-typical’ work environment, that communication with colleagues and clients will cause serious problems, and that autistic people can only perform roles that require repetition and working with small details and systems, such as data analysts and software specialists. But this is simply not the case.

“I’ve worked with and spoken to people on the autism spectrum in a variety of departments and roles, including social media experts and finance. They can do any job that matches their skills, just like anyone else. It is wrong to pigeonhole them into technical roles,” says Emily Swiatek, Employment Training Consultant at the National Autistic Society.

Fortunately, there are signs across the business world that things are changing. A CIPD conference a few years ago was all about why companies should hire autistic people, and now they’re addressing how companies can go about recruiting those with autism.

“Managers need to stop being scared of hiring autistic people, and instead focus on what positives they can bring to a role, and identify/work out how best to overcome any potential challenges. It’s worth getting the feet wet and learning as you go. You’re not going to have all the answers, but often autistic people produce some wonderful surprises in what they can achieve,” stresses Dianah Worman, Diversity Adviser at the CIPD.

Indeed, more and more companies are proactively recruiting autistic people based on their skillsets and the benefits they can bring to an organisation. One of the major players on this front is the global IT software company SAP.

“We introduced an Autism at Work programme a couple of years ago with the objective to have 1% of our global workforce represented by people with autism by 2020,” explains Jose Velasco, who heads up the programme for SAP. “Working with partners around the world, we go through a thorough recruitment process to identify candidates’ skills, social issues that need addressing, and give them sessions with the managers of the relevant departments (where they make presentations), so that they can get to know each other. The managers are blown away by these sessions.”
Already SAP has 55 autistic employees based in the US alone, covering a variety of different roles, including communications, graphic design and IT project management. So far, the programme has been a great success, and SAP are being approached by several other companies to adopt similar programmes.

“We’re currently piloting an autism at work programme, using SAP as our model,” says Fleur Bothwick, director of diversity and inclusiveness at Ernst & Young. “We also have a stammering network, and groups focusing on dyslexia and mental health issues.

“The important thing is for managers and employees to receive education, or do their own research, about the different conditions, what behavioural traits to look out for, how to provide support, and most importantly openly communicate with those affected about what they like and need.”

There can be issues like what hours suit them; whether there are particular situations where they don’t feel comfortable; any changes to their roles; when and how they want to discuss their performance review etc. This, in turn, reduces any anxieties for both parties (the manager and the employee).
The autism spectrum is, of course, extremely varied, which is why it is so important to identify the strengths and challenges of each individual, particularly any communication issues. Bringing in outside help can be beneficial.

“We provide one-to-one sessions with autistic people, including those with mild forms of autism, known as STEMs (Scientists, Technologists, Engineers and Mathematicians), often to address any social communication issues they’re having with colleagues,” explains Emma Seward, a consultant business psychologist. “Normally, when we’re coaching we won’t tell people what to do, but with STEMs we often need to explain simple things like greeting your work mates when you come into the office. We also talk with their colleagues so that they understand that the person isn’t being rude, they just process information and communicate differently, and can find it hard to empathise.”

There can be an obsession in business with social and emotional competence, asserts Sally Moore, Director at Top Stream Coaching. You only have to look at some of the job adverts specifying the need for “good interpersonal skills”, and “team players”. But actually if you “reduce social expectations and accommodate differences in approaches, companies find that they can get the best out of their autistic employees, managing challenges and avoiding vulnerabilities.”

Appreciating and valuing a different world view can only be a good thing is the unanimous view of all the experts questioned for this piece. “Sometimes adjustments might need to be made in terms of clearer communication and strategies. For example, some autistic people don’t like ambiguous information, such as ‘I’ll get back to you later’, but not specifying a time, or changing meeting times at the last minute. But actually clarity on these issues can benefit all employees,” argues Steve Williams, Head of Equality at Acas.

The overall feeling is that hiring more people with neurological conditions is a positive thing, and creating a culture of awareness and understanding in the workplace to allow them to flourish can only help alleviate any fears, remove stigmas and avoid confrontations based on misunderstandings.

Click here to download a PDF version of this article